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 Posted: Fri, 7th Nov 2008 17:16 Post subject: |
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 then stay out the deserts lol or you will get chased and eaten by them lol |
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| Posted: Fri, 7th Nov 2008 17:27 Post subject: |
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And I thought that the biggest problem in the deserts are scorpions and snakes...
"Quantum mechanics is actually, contrary to it's reputation, unbeliveably simple, once you take the physics out."
Scott Aaronson | chiv wrote: | | thats true you know. newton didnt discover gravity. the apple told him about it, and then he killed it. the core was never found. |
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WaldoJ
VIP Member
Posts: 32678
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| Posted: Sat, 8th Nov 2008 18:28 Post subject: |
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| Oddmaker wrote: | I once had 2 spiders on my head while they were mating  |
 you got spider semen in your hair! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!
| Sin317 wrote: | | I win, you lose. Or Go fuck yourself. |
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| Posted: Sat, 8th Nov 2008 19:25 Post subject: |
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| Oddmaker wrote: | | I once had 2 spiders on my head while they were mating |
Hahaha Now its quite possible that your story will mark a start of a new chapter in this thread. People will post the most bizarre and weird spider related stories. But in the end we will be discussing dolphin sex  |
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| Posted: Sat, 8th Nov 2008 19:59 Post subject: |
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| Posted: Sat, 8th Nov 2008 23:11 Post subject: |
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| moosenoodles wrote: | | WhiteBarbarian wrote: | | Oddmaker wrote: | | I once had 2 spiders on my head while they were mating |
Hahaha Now its quite possible that your story will mark a start of a new chapter in this thread. People will post the most bizarre and weird spider related stories. But in the end we will be discussing dolphin sex |
could be nice all that rubbery feeling skin tight against you. |
Pervert  dolphin sex as in dolphin with dolphin, and not sex with a dolphin as in human with a dolphin... speaking about that, I actually have no idea if it would be possible at all... Time to dig some wikis  |
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| Posted: Sat, 8th Nov 2008 23:12 Post subject: |
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lol just go dig some dolphins and write up your own wiki
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| Posted: Sun, 9th Nov 2008 00:48 Post subject: |
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| moosenoodles wrote: | | lol just go dig some dolphins and write up your own wiki |
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Lutzifer
Modzilla
Posts: 12740
Location: ____________________ **** vegan zombie **** GRRAAIIINNSS _______
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| Posted: Sun, 9th Nov 2008 20:54 Post subject: |
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my first encounter with the term "zoophilia" was on nforce and it envolved erotic short-stories of sex with dolphins, so the "truth is out there"
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| Posted: Sun, 9th Nov 2008 23:56 Post subject: |
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I knew a girl who wanted to have sex with a dolphin, coincidentally she had a face that looked like Dori off Finding Nemo.
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 09:16 Post subject: |
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| Newty182 wrote: | | moosenoodles wrote: | When i was out in dubai the camel spiders used to piss me off, I had to walk from my villa about 1 mile across sand and a maze of odd layed out road networks and you can bet no matter how hard you try you always run into a web somewhere and scream like a girl lol.. What bothered me was I was told that they lay theyre eggs under your skin and when they hatch you can see them move around between your skin layers lol.
Although the ones I encountered mainly were hand size at most, look at this bastard..
some funny stories here from various military types etc about them ..
http://www.camelspiders.net/camel-spider.htm
Fuck that shit!
Like something out of the fucking film Alien. |
thats the pic i was just about to post. i NEVER wana come anywhere near one of those bastards. |
id piss my pants if i say one of those things coming at me...unless i had a nice big, sharp as a razor machete...then id hack the fuckin thing up. |
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 09:33 Post subject: |
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the fucking thing would bite you before you could even take a hit
the only safe way against those things is a fucking flamethrower
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 10:12 Post subject: |
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| FireMaster wrote: | the fucking thing would bite you before you could even take a hit
the only safe way against those things is a fucking flamethrower |
lol true. I dunno what Id do then. I know I'd atleast try and make a break for it.
Are they fast? Like faster than humans? |
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 10:21 Post subject: |
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| SycoShaman wrote: | | FireMaster wrote: | the fucking thing would bite you before you could even take a hit
the only safe way against those things is a fucking flamethrower |
lol true. I dunno what Id do then. I know I'd atleast try and make a break for it.
Are they fast? Like faster than humans? |
thing is they can bite you anywhere , if you're standing they'll bite your legs , if you go down to kill it they'll bite your hands/arm it's fucked up the only thing is to kill them from a distance
like throwing something pretty heavy on them
don't even think of taking it by surprise because they turn and bite in a split of a second
use distant attacks or just run away
if you're near you better be wearing some thick pants and big giant boots
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 10:31 Post subject: |
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| FireMaster wrote: | | SycoShaman wrote: | | FireMaster wrote: | the fucking thing would bite you before you could even take a hit
the only safe way against those things is a fucking flamethrower |
lol true. I dunno what Id do then. I know I'd atleast try and make a break for it.
Are they fast? Like faster than humans? |
thing is they can bite you anywhere , if you're standing they'll bite your legs , if you go down to kill it they'll bite your hands/arm it's fucked up the only thing is to kill them from a distance
like throwing something pretty heavy on them
don't even think of taking it by surprise because they turn and bite in a split of a second
use distant attacks or just run away
if you're near you better be wearing some thick pants and big giant boots |
lol well, i wont be going to the desert anytime soon then lol |
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 12:55 Post subject: |
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the fuck do they want anyway? eat you?
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 13:01 Post subject: |
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| JahLux wrote: | | the fuck do they want anyway? eat you? |
you're a threat to their lives , threats get eliminated , spiders don't fuck around
they're hostile
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 22:44 Post subject: |
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| moosenoodles wrote: | | Hey syco are they fast ? heheh put it this way, you can run from them and they will follow you at 10pmh ... jumping at you trying to bite you. its seriously like something out of a scary movie lol..Oh and they are aggressive as fuck, you throw something in its way to block it, most animals would stop and go fuck and wait, these just bypass it and carry right on after your ass lol.. Ruunnnn forreeessstttt. They do eventually give up though.. But its not till they suss you out and are sure you have the edge on them. |
so how are you supposed to kill one if you dont have a gun?
and if you try and get away, how would you? you cant run faster than 10mph, i assume they can climb trees better than humans etc how would one get away from one of those fuckin crazy ass nasty things? |
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 22:55 Post subject: |
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| FireMaster wrote: | the fucking thing would bite you before you could even take a hit
the only safe way against those things is a fucking flamethrower |
how about fucking bazooka?
IM TOO EPIC FOR THIS SHIT.......
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helvete
Posts: 2727
Location: Sweden
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Lutzifer
Modzilla
Posts: 12740
Location: ____________________ **** vegan zombie **** GRRAAIIINNSS _______
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 23:09 Post subject: |
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add to that, that there are little fish in south-america that swim up your penis and lay their eggs there, and you got yourself a good view of "god's creatures"
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 10th Nov 2008 23:42 Post subject: |
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| Lutzifer wrote: | | add to that, that there are little fish in south-america that swim up your penis and lay their eggs there, and you got yourself a good view of "god's creatures" |
your lying....right? I hope your lying....
Cause if its true, giant spiders, tiny fish that lay eggs in your cock and shit....well, Im NEVER going to Africa. Ever.... |
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| Posted: Tue, 11th Nov 2008 00:21 Post subject: |
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| SycoShaman wrote: | | Lutzifer wrote: | | add to that, that there are little fish in south-america that swim up your penis and lay their eggs there, and you got yourself a good view of "god's creatures" |
your lying....right? I hope your lying....
Cause if its true, giant spiders, tiny fish that lay eggs in your cock and shit....well, Im NEVER going to Africa. Ever.... |
Nope, unfortunately he is not
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Candiru
| Quote: | Attacks on people
This fish is also known to attack humans and animals and swim into an orifice (the vagina, anus, or even the penis—and deep into the urethra).[4] Because of spines protruding from the fish, it is almost impossible to remove except through surgery.[7] Though there have been documented candiru attacks on humans,[8] there is no evidence the fish can survive once inside a human. The danger for the person lies more in the infection and shock that results from having the organism lodged there for an extended period of time than from physical damage done by the actual fish itself.
The fish locates its human targets when people urinate near the fish. A well-circulated myth is that the candiru is capable of swimming up the stream of urine in mid-air to a victim standing on shore or a boat, although this assertion is likely false. Nonetheless, there was a case in which the victim claimed that the fish jumped while he was urinating thigh deep.[8] They are also probably not attracted to pure urine.[4] It is believed that they are able to enter a human urethra only when it is expanded during urination.[8] |
 Spoiler: | "Nope, unfortunately he is not "... Sounds a little awkward to my ear.
Is "Nope, unfortunately he doesn't" is more grammatically correct ? |
Last edited by WhiteBarbarian on Tue, 11th Nov 2008 00:34; edited 3 times in total |
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Tue, 11th Nov 2008 00:24 Post subject: |
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Holy fuckin jesus christ....
Never going to africa....
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Tue, 11th Nov 2008 00:33 Post subject: |
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| FireMaster wrote: | | SycoShaman wrote: | Holy fuckin jesus christ....
Never going to africa.... |
he said south america
and north africa is safe , the souther you go the more fucked up it gets
just stick to north urban areas in Morocco and you'll be fine |
oh my bad, I thought I read south africa. Well, where ever this fish are, Im not going there |
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| Posted: Tue, 11th Nov 2008 00:36 Post subject: |
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| SycoShaman wrote: | | moosenoodles wrote: | | Hey syco are they fast ? heheh put it this way, you can run from them and they will follow you at 10pmh ... jumping at you trying to bite you. its seriously like something out of a scary movie lol..Oh and they are aggressive as fuck, you throw something in its way to block it, most animals would stop and go fuck and wait, these just bypass it and carry right on after your ass lol.. Ruunnnn forreeessstttt. They do eventually give up though.. But its not till they suss you out and are sure you have the edge on them. |
so how are you supposed to kill one if you dont have a gun?
and if you try and get away, how would you? you cant run faster than 10mph, i assume they can climb trees better than humans etc how would one get away from one of those fuckin crazy ass nasty things? |
You can run faster then 10mph, unless you're a child or otherwise impaired. I've been chased by one before while I was on holiday in Mexico. I had to push myself to outrun it, it's speed is really unexpected, but they don't chase you for that long especially during the day as they're nocturnal. Also, they don't jump, they don't have the capacity to incline their legs at more then 30 degrees.
They're not spiders. They're from the same Class (Arachnida) but a completely different Order. They lay their eggs in burrows too, come on they have none of the typical features of a parasitoid.
"Techniclly speaking, Beta-Manboi didnt inject Burberry_Massi with Benz, he injected him with liquid that had air bubbles in it, which caused benz." - House M.D
"Faith without logic is the same as knowledge without understanding; meaningless"
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