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 Posted: Sun, 14th Aug 2005 23:28 Post subject: What a lovely event! |
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What a lovely Girlfriend do I have!
I mean, I love her, she's a girl every man dreams of... But one incident ruined a day with her for me... and I can't get it out of my head.
I think of myself as an educated and quite intelligent person, so I know that girls are humans as well as guys are but I just CAN'T accept the fact that they go to the toilet and crap. Girls + shit? There's no match there, bud. Not for me. Not in my book.
So I've erased this knowledge (knowledge that girls need to go to the toilet to do shit (how do you say this in English? They don't teach it in schools here in Poland, you know... I hope that you understand the rest of my message). Since then I've been living a wonderful and happy life with or without a girlfriend.
But now.... things have changed... Forever.
Imagine a situation like this: You're in a room with your girlfriend. You talk, kiss, touch each other. Quite normal, right? She tells you that she needs to go to the toilet. No problem there. Off you go. (in a moment like this I DON'T think about what she's doing there... maybe taking a piss... that's normal, I haven't erased that). Now she calls you and says that there's a problem with a toilet. It's stuck. You tell her to use a.... a... how's it called... You know - a stick that helps you if the toilet's stuck. She tells you that she doesn't know how to use it. So here you are, standing in the toilet, looking at her crap and cleaning the toilet until it's not stuck and the water can come thru...
I was in a situation like this for the first time about a week ago. I can't get it out of my head. FUCK!
Yeah, you can tell me that I'm a little kid that doesn't have serious problems. You can tell me that life's shit. Well... It's OFFICIAL Bitchin' Spot...
Damn.
Shitty view there, old chaps.
Five.
Thirty seven.
Ninety two and a half.
(I'm out of my mind... help me forget!)
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| Posted: Sun, 14th Aug 2005 23:30 Post subject: |
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Unless you couldn't get it up after that, you're a little kid with no serious problem.
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Sun, 14th Aug 2005 23:34 Post subject: |
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Yeah man, unless ur dick is perm soft from that, its not a problem and just a qwerk of urs ya know
As long as she showers (and u as well) once or twice a day, then its all good ya know
Women need to shit to ya know...now if she does it on you...different story unless ur into that kinda thing.
Stick that fixes toliet = Plunger 
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| Posted: Sun, 14th Aug 2005 23:42 Post subject: |
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Is this supposed to be funny?
"Techniclly speaking, Beta-Manboi didnt inject Burberry_Massi with Benz, he injected him with liquid that had air bubbles in it, which caused benz." - House M.D
"Faith without logic is the same as knowledge without understanding; meaningless"
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MAD_MAX333
Moderator
Posts: 7020
Location: Toronto, Canada...eh
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 01:07 Post subject: |
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well then, atleast i got a hard on... made my day
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 01:15 Post subject: |
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| MAD_MAX333 wrote: | | well then, atleast i got a hard on... made my day |
 .....  |
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 03:11 Post subject: |
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just stare at my sig, the sexiness will hypnotise you into forgettin it 
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[sYn]
[Moderator] Elitist
Posts: 8374
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 03:16 Post subject: |
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Oh Jesus dude.. I had a chat about this with my girl a few nights ago.. It ended in me shouting down the phone "BYE HUNNY IM GOING FOR A SHIT.. UURRGG"
Needless to say.. we promised to never talk about it again..
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Mutantius
VIP Member
Posts: 18594
Location: In Elektro looking for beans
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kosmiq
Posts: 2304
Location: Somewhere
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 07:49 Post subject: |
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Come on, you can't accept that they need to go to the toilet? Give me a break here... Why would that even matter? Its not like I care if a girl says "ehhh dude, I gotta go take a shit"... So what? Let her go to the toilet and do her thing.
Go seek help or something, its as natural as you or me going to the toilet and take a shitbreak...
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 10:33 Post subject: |
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Yeah, yeah, let him have 'em!
Err... It's about me. Whoops.
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 10:54 Post subject: |
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I guess this sorta rules out that you take her in the ass, or is that ok with you ?
Per Ardua Ad Astra
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Rofl_Mao
Posts: 3187
Location: Nederland
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 11:59 Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | You tell her to use a.... a... how's it called... You know - a stick that helps you if the toilet's stuck. She tells you that she doesn't know how to use it. So here you are, standing in the toilet, looking at her crap and cleaning the toilet until it's not stuck and the water can come thru... |
The garden hose works much better for me, as it's both flexible and rigid and will poke through almost any obstruction of faeces. (I have a very long history of 'log jams' in the toilet).
| Lopin18 wrote: | I think you played too much Fallout 3, Pedo Perk acquired.  |
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fisk
Posts: 9145
Location: Von Oben
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| Posted: Mon, 15th Aug 2005 12:23 Post subject: |
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Even models go and take a dump sometimes, especially when they had the jalaneño hot chili-dip, and drank tequilas with it.
Yes, yes I'm back.
Somewhat.
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kosmiq
Posts: 2304
Location: Somewhere
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Lutzifer
Modzilla
Posts: 12740
Location: ____________________ **** vegan zombie **** GRRAAIIINNSS _______
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| Posted: Wed, 17th Aug 2005 01:48 Post subject: |
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check out ratemypoo.com and watch those pics till you get a different view on life.
Life is shit. It thrives on it, its born from it and will crumble into a heap of pure brown stinky shit, when you die. Live with it
Working in a home for the elderly for a few months might help also to get your problem solved 
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Lutzifer
Modzilla
Posts: 12740
Location: ____________________ **** vegan zombie **** GRRAAIIINNSS _______
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| Posted: Wed, 17th Aug 2005 01:50 Post subject: |
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nearly forgot, vegetarians smell better hahahaha
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poullou
Posts: 1746
Location: Internet Express
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| Posted: Wed, 17th Aug 2005 08:37 Post subject: |
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there is just two fingers of space between assholes and pussies hahaha.
well, don't take it so serious. you crap too, don't you? it's nothing she can change for you and it is 100% natural.
maybe you should talk to her about it....i mean if she is soooo cool as you said, she won't give a crap (hahahah sorry).
jesus christ was a gangsta rapper. they killed him. he came back and made a platinum album.
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| Posted: Thu, 18th Aug 2005 23:03 Post subject: |
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girls do yummy shits, try eating it like i do while you fuck.
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