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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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 Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 07:25 Post subject: Objectification |
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nothing
Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 10:15; edited 1 time in total
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 08:17 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Interinactive on Mon, 4th Oct 2021 23:07; edited 1 time in total
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konkol84
Posts: 3679
Location: Po(o)land
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 08:52 Post subject: |
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People are objects, so what's the problem?
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 09:03 Post subject: |
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More of a subconscious assessment than full fledged thoughts, but yes. Especially if I still don't know the woman as a person then there is very little else to think about.
But if the author means to extrapolate to every interaction with a woman...then that's a bit of a stretch...
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 09:17 Post subject: |
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Denying a basic impulse would be dishonest. That's not really my thing.
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 09:58 Post subject: |
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Last edited by paxsali on Thu, 4th Jul 2024 21:27; edited 1 time in total
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JBeckman
VIP Member
Posts: 34997
Location: Sweden
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:27 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:35 Post subject: |
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I don't see the point in defending what's from nature that I'm not in control of. This being the urge itself - not the potential action following it. I might as well try to defend being hungry or having to take a dump every once in a while.
I've made it clear to my GF that I have the same common impulse everyone else has, and that I'm choosing not to act on it because I've made a conscious choice towards love and commitment. To me, having a long-term relationship of trust and fidelity is infinitely more valuable than getting to fuck some hot babe - given the chance - only to destroy the emotional bond with your partner.
To me, there's a huge difference between having an urge to fuck someone - and then acting on it.
However, I'm not into denial for the sake of some ignorant illusion on the part of others, female or otherwise.
As such, I refuse to "pretend" that I'm not physically attracted to physically attractive females. If you go that way, you're going to face an endless uphill battle of "white lies" and defending what you can't avoid no matter what you do.
Last edited by Casus on Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:36; edited 1 time in total
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:36 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Interinactive on Mon, 4th Oct 2021 23:07; edited 1 time in total
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konkol84
Posts: 3679
Location: Po(o)land
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:36 Post subject: |
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@Nalo But it's not about looking at someone with the baddest motherfucker look on your face, just assessing in your hear if you would take that guy on or not. You don't look at women like a fucking rapist phsycho do you?
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:43 Post subject: |
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I don't wonder whether I could take someone in a fight, because I have essentially no fighting experience. Meaning, some scrawny kid with street experience could probably kick my ass. Maybe, by some miracle, I could take down a bigger guy or whatever - but I have absolutely no experience from which to draw any kind of useful assumption.
Maybe if I actually had the experience and training, I would find it interesting. But I could no more take some bad-ass dude than I could outgoal Ronaldo.
That said, I hope I can do something effective if I end up having to defend someone and there's no other choice. That said, I think it would come down to luck more than any skill of mine.
I tell myself that I'm very fast and to-the-point - but that's worth shit if you don't know what you're doing - and I don't really know what the fuck I'm talking about. Also, given my lack of experience - the adrenaline itself would kick my ass, because I wouldn't know how to control my basic fear in many cases. I'm average in size with a measure of modest muscle mass, but I doubt it would intimidate anyone with real experience.
Also, I'm getting old 
Last edited by Casus on Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:48; edited 2 times in total
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:46 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 10:48 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 11:12 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 12:26 Post subject: |
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when I see a person for the first time i judge him an place him in a separate "behaviour" bucket
I have several of these buckets, and people in each bucket tend to behave the same way generally and listen to the same music (I may also rate people by the music they listen to)
and of course I have rated each bucket by attractiveness too
if a girl is in an attractive bucket, she must be really ugly for me to not want to have sex with her
for men I just rate them "bro" or "not bro"
| Lutzifer wrote: | | and yes, mine is only average |
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tonizito
VIP Member
Posts: 51430
Location: Portugal, the shithole of Europe.
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 15:40 Post subject: |
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Isn't that just your reptilian brain taking over for the first 1-2 seconds? And if so, can you even prevent it from happening?
| boundle (thoughts on cracking AITD) wrote: | | i guess thouth if without a legit key the installation was rolling back we are all fucking then |
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 15:49 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 15:55 Post subject: |
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I think this is normal behaviour. We present ourselves to be attractive, and attractiveness is based on what makes people want to have sex with us.
It's normal for men and women, when they first see someone, to quickly judge them on a "this person succeeded in being attractive/didn't succeed at it". We want people to desire us.
With that said, in regard to the author, that seems like a pretty lame excuse for not writing better characters. There's a difference between "first encounter" and an entire book. I think that this justification would only apply if the goal of the book is to denounce this part of us, focusing entirely on this and nothing else. But he says that women are objects to him (before mentioning the "first look" part), so I'm a bit skeptical.
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 16:00 Post subject: |
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| tonizito wrote: | | Isn't that just your reptilian brain taking over for the first 1-2 seconds? And if so, can you even prevent it from happening? |
don't know about fighting, but you can completely ignore it
although some women want men to look at them, so I have to make an effort to look at her boobs so she catches me looking 
| Lutzifer wrote: | | and yes, mine is only average |
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ixigia
[Moderator] Consigliere
Posts: 65089
Location: Italy
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 18:09 Post subject: |
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I always fantasize about all of you being naked in a draw me like one of your French girls way, yes 
And this is only the first thought ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
But it really is normal, we're practically bonobos after all, only meaner and even more perverted :<
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 18:15 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:03; edited 2 times in total
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ixigia
[Moderator] Consigliere
Posts: 65089
Location: Italy
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 18:32 Post subject: |
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| Nalo wrote: | That's the Italian blood  |
Haha 
It's even worse in a nitroglycerin-like way when you pour some wine in it!
But all jokes aside, it is definitely instinctive, in a harmless way purely left to the imagination. I know many people here though that go way too far and start whistling like peacocks in heat when the process is on, now that's just silly and embarrassing.  |
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JBeckman
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Posts: 34997
Location: Sweden
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 19:48 Post subject: |
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couleur
[Moderator] Janitor
Posts: 14361
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| Posted: Tue, 26th Jul 2016 21:51 Post subject: |
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Do I objectify women and think about sex with those who look adequate? Of course. Is it all I think about these women. Of course not.
I think objectification (as a sexual object) is quite normal, but it is certainly only a part of all the thoughts I have about women I meet. While certainly the most emotionally involving relation, the whole "meeting someone" is alot more complex than that.
"Enlightenment is man's emergence from his self-imposed nonage. Nonage is the inability to use one's own understanding without another's guidance. This nonage is self-imposed if its cause lies not in lack of understanding but in indecision and lack of courage to use one's own mind without another's guidance. Dare to know! (Sapere aude.) "Have the courage to use your own understanding," is therefore the motto of the enlightenment."
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