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 Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 06:08 Post subject: Would you move out? |
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One of my best friends is going through some hardship right now.
The thing is, his father is quite violent when he's drunk, and quite drunk regularly enough.
The other day, his father was at it again, this time really, really violent (it wasn't the first time the cops had to be called to make sure my friend and his stepmom were safe.) Right now my friend is at my place, and he's made up his mind to move away from his parents, get a room in a shared apartment and a job, and live that way until his grandparents come back from Brazil in november and he can move in with them. However, he seems quite lost and not too sure of his decision. What would you advise me to tell him?
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 08:13 Post subject: |
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time to grow up, move out and find a job. exactly.
"Only one country can destroy NATO in 40 minutes - it's Russia"
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 08:33 Post subject: |
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Move out. Me personally if my dad were to lash out on me I'd take him on right back, but that's only cause I know I can. If he was bigger than me I'd hide. But ya, I defintatly wouldn't want to be in a house like that. How old is he btw?
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 08:41 Post subject: |
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Agree'd but from what I have seen, and I know everyone isn't like this, but a lot of those alcoholic abusing people are aware of their actions and their so hard ass strung at being tough that they just don't care. you try to help them with the problem they'd end up just walking out getting more alcohol, forget just about everything that happened other than they pissed him off and go back and start hitting again.
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 10:34 Post subject: |
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How old is this friend Accelleron?
I hate you.
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 11:47 Post subject: |
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TELL YOUR FRIEND TO MAN UP AND GET THE SHOVEL
cockcockcockcockcockcockcockcockcockcockcockcock
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Godlikez*
Banned
Posts: 2722
Location: In Your Illusions
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 13:14 Post subject: |
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he should start to fight back 
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nouseforaname
Über-VIP Member
Posts: 21306
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 16:24 Post subject: |
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| Dazz99 wrote: | | TELL YOUR FRIEND TO MAN UP AND GET THE SHOVEL |
asus z170-A || core i5-6600K || geforce gtx 970 4gb || 16gb ddr4 ram || win10 || 1080p led samsung 27"
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 20:20 Post subject: |
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| Stealth88 wrote: | | How old is this friend Accelleron? |
20.
As for the people saying to stick around and get him help, well, his father is somewhat unique. He typically ignores the guy almost entirely, from what I've seen, and is relatively nice to me when I come over. So I think the father dislikes my friend entirely... If anything, from what I understand my friend left the country for a month, and his dad was ~normal when he came back. For some reason, this degraded to current situation in less than 30 days... |
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Cohen
Posts: 7155
Location: Rapture
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Aug 2007 20:47 Post subject: |
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Let him stay at your place.. ask your parents if he can, as long as he pays rent and works his way. As in gets a job, pays your parents a little money for a while. That way he will be safe and not worrying about running his own place (Believe that is not gonna be what he needs right now).
Im sure that will be a good fix for the situation.
troll detected by SiN
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deelix
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Posts: 32062
Location: Norway
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 15:40 Post subject: |
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add some sleeping pills to his regular drink
that should solve the problem for sure and no one will care that much, just make sure to have an alibi
another choice as was suggested before, get a job and get an apartment
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 16:27 Post subject: |
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If he's as old as 20, move out.
People move out when they're 16, so why shouldnt a 20yrs old do it?
I hate you.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 17:09 Post subject: |
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It's easy to say move out, but it depends on the guy's finances. I'd love to move out, not cause my dad's a drunk, but I love my own space. But houses here cost £300k (London) and rent is minimum £600ish for sharing. I cannot afford this.
However, if moving out and paying rent by an easy to get job is an option he should definately do that. If anyone got drunk with me and was abusive I'd give it back and never speak to them again. I always think you should treat family like you treat anyone else. You woudln't let frineds get away with this shit, so why family?
But clearly, best thing is to move out and get a job to pay rent.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 17:19 Post subject: |
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i moved out without penny in my pocket at the age 15
found job and apartment
guess it depends how badly u want it
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 19:57 Post subject: |
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At 20 he can get a job and move out. His Dad will never change. Good for you Accelleron for helping him out and giving him a place to stay. maybe he can rent a small space from you or your family till he gets a job and a damage deposit and first months rent. Just watch that he doesn't take advantage of you.
As far as his mom it is up to her to take care of herself. She is an adult. Abused people always have a hard time leaving the abuser. More often than not they can't be saved. I have seen guys kicking the shit outta some girl and someone goes in to help her and SHE turns on the guy helping her. Craziness.
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deelix
PDIP Member
Posts: 32062
Location: Norway
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Aug 2007 22:26 Post subject: |
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| Mortibus wrote: | i moved out without penny in my pocket at the age 15
found job and apartment
guess it depends how badly u want it |
yeah of course. I got my own door and lock at least. And expensive insuranse and low income. 1 more year and I will get normal income (still in training period at work) ^^
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Posts: 145
Location: at my computer
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Aug 2007 21:43 Post subject: |
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Move out or knock 'em out!
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| Posted: Tue, 7th Aug 2007 14:29 Post subject: Re: Would you move out? |
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| Accelleron wrote: | One of my best friends is going through some hardship right now.
The thing is, his father is quite violent when he's drunk, and quite drunk regularly enough.
The other day, his father was at it again, this time really, really violent (it wasn't the first time the cops had to be called to make sure my friend and his stepmom were safe.) Right now my friend is at my place, and he's made up his mind to move away from his parents, get a room in a shared apartment and a job, and live that way until his grandparents come back from Brazil in november and he can move in with them. However, he seems quite lost and not too sure of his decision. What would you advise me to tell him? |
tell him to move out
and then do something about that gay pic in your signature 
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| Posted: Thu, 9th Aug 2007 16:11 Post subject: |
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i'd beat the crap out of my dad
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| Posted: Thu, 9th Aug 2007 17:57 Post subject: |
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| undataker wrote: | | i'd beat the crap out of my dad |
you wouldnt do that if you didnt know any other behaviour from your dad. with the influences in growing up you had, you would, and thats not a bad thing but try to picture yourself in his friends situation. |
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