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Mutantius
VIP Member
Posts: 18594
Location: In Elektro looking for beans
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 Posted: Thu, 2nd Feb 2006 16:25 Post subject: The Awful Truth Behind The Worst Director In The World |
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Well dont know if it has been posted before:
Hollywood often complains about box office slumps. They blame piracy, they blame DVD sales, they blame anyone and anything but themselves. You see Hollywood’s a bit like North Korea, if they ever admitted that the regime they run was flawed and oppressive the people at the top of the tower would come crashing down. So, like any good regime, they choose to blame their failures on the peasants for either not submitting a big enough offering or stealing from the state. The savvier public, however, blame an endless onslaught of mediocre, hollow projects that are touted as remakes, sequels, prequels, re-imaginings, reinventions or video game adaptations. To me that’s just a whole lot of different ways for marketing people to say “lazy recycled crap” but I digress.
But ask yourself this; what if you discovered a miraculous way to make a profit from making these bad movies? An ingenious way to guarantee that if your movie flops, you’ll actually make money. Wouldn’t a box office slump be the perfect climate for you; slipping your bad movies into a world where blockbusters are failing weekly? If it flops, the studios will blame the ticket buyers for not buying or the “illegal” downloaders for stealing instead of you for intentionally sucking. Meanwhile, you sit back safe and secure in the knowledge that while your project drops out of the 300 theatres it was showing in after 2 weeks, it is actually making you a mint. Sound unlikely?
http://www.cinemablend.com/feature.php?id=209
"Why don't you zip it, Zipfero?" - fraich3
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Spun[k]
Posts: 1714
Location: SWEDEN
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Cheez-It
Posts: 1106
Location: Rochester, NY
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| Posted: Thu, 2nd Feb 2006 19:34 Post subject: |
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Gotta love Dave Barry
| Quote: | | Meanwhile, the U.S. film industry, in the midst of the worst box-office slump in 20 years, looks for possible explanations as to why Americans are not flocking to movie theaters. In a totally unrelated development, ``The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lavagirl'' opens nationwide, to be followed in coming months by ``The Dukes of Hazzard'' and ``Deuce Bigalow, European Gigolo. |
Anyways, there are a large number of explanations
1.) Movie Quality
2.) Movie Type. There were fewer "must see in theater" releases this year. Movies like LOTR, Star Wars and other hyped movies with good "effects"
3.) Home Theater quality. As display sizes and resolutions increase, the only reason to leave the house to see a new movie asides from time (wanting to see it sooner) are removed. When HDTV becomes the norm in a few years, I forsee even less theater sales.
4.) Cellphone usage has increased and as theaters can't legally block them, I see no point in watching a movie interupted by shitty rings vs in the comfort of my home. The annoying loud people also dissapear when you watch movies in your home
5.) Piracy. Piracy DOES account for a portion of the lost sales, but a *very* small one. Firstly, you have to eliminate everyone under the age of ~21, or more accurately, anyone without a consitent normal paying job. You also need to rule out those with very small wages. These people would not have paid the exhorbidant amount in the first place due to financial constraints. I know this is why I download most movies and only pay for the very best. I have no money to buy everything. So basically, that leaves people with well paying jobs, and while I obviously don't have figures, it's not hard to imagine that even the people amoung this group who ascribe to piracy probably pay their way to some movies and DVDs.
Anyways... The MPAA and movie studios have NOTHING to cry about and EVERYTHING to change.
Some changes I would like to see:
1.) Simultaneous DVD/Theater release
2.) Better movies
3.) Cell-Phone Blocking
4.) Internet availability. With the increasing broadband capabilities of citizens, offer well encoded slightly cheaper than retail downloads.
Theaters will not be playing as big a part in the future unless they innovate. Let's see some new technology not available at home.
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Feb 2006 02:52 Post subject: |
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Feb 2006 04:20 Post subject: |
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haha, i always loved kojima, he s the man 
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| Posted: Sat, 4th Feb 2006 15:28 Post subject: |
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Honestly, did they really think someone is going to create there own home theatre experience and still go out and buy a movie ticket? Like every big industry, they love the old ways of doing business and they will create hell on earth to keep there outdated business models.
Hollywood is putting out so much crap it is increasingly more difficult to wade through it all. Uwe is a real good example, how does this clown continue to get financing?
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Feb 2006 14:34 Post subject: |
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Fuck Uwe Boll!
The more things change, The more they stay the same.
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SycoShaman
VIP Master Jedi
Posts: 24468
Location: Toronto, Canada
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Feb 2006 18:30 Post subject: |
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Well, bad movies and theatre prices and piracy are affecting the industry.
But its also the experience.
Like, I like to get into movies, have a few beers while im watching a good movie, smoke a few spliffs, smoke some cigarettes, eat some chinese food etc All the while sitting/laying comfortably on my couch, listening to my home theatre system which i think sounds better than any theatre ive been to recently.
Why go to the theatre? U pay least $8 (at a shit theatre too) for a ticket, reg size popcorn and drink = around $7 + candy, cant smoke in the theatre, no alcohol, cant pause it if u have to take a leak so your missing part of the movie....really, no point in going to theatre anymore.
back in the day, movies were better on the big screen, better sound, better picture etc etc
But fuck, I'd rather sit comfortably on my couch, being able to drink/smoke/eat whatever i want, watching the movie on my crystal clear plasma and listening to it on 5.1 surround sound than go to some theatre with people + cost of going....fuck that.
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| Posted: Mon, 13th Feb 2006 16:57 Post subject: |
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wait... 'alone in the dark' was *worse* than 'house of the dead' ?? i swear the article linked mentioned that... insert head hitting keyboard sound *here*...
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spankie
VIP Member
Posts: 2958
Location: Belgium
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| Posted: Wed, 15th Feb 2006 17:32 Post subject: |
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you cant blame him. It is all about the money. He makes the money by making shit, so whos the smart guy then 
btw i checked his movies on imdb. He should get an oscar for making bad movies. It must be hard to make bad movies on purpose. Because mostly, when you make somehting really bad, some people see it as criticism on something or they love it because it is so bad.
And what about his gaming movies? Far Cry, Dungeon Siege, Postal ... lolz
# Far Cry (2008) (announced) (producer)
# Fear Effect (2008) (announced) (executive producer)
# Postal (2007) (announced) (executive producer) (producer)
# In the Name of the King: A Dungeon Siege Tale (2006) (post-production) (executive producer)
# BloodRayne (2005) (executive producer) 2.2/10 (bottom 100: #19 ) (25.000.000$ production cost, 2.000.000$ gross)
# House of the Dead (2003) (producer) 2.1/10 (bottom 100: #14)
... aka House of the dead: Le jeu ne fait que commencer (Canada: French title)
# Heart of America (2003) (executive producer) 5.5/10
# Blackwoods (2002) (executive producer) 4.9/10
# Angels Don't Sleep Here (2001) (executive producer) 3.8/10
... aka Backflash 2: Angels Don't Sleep Here (UK)
# Amour, l'argent, l'amour, L' (2000) (co-producer) 6.1/10
... aka Amour, L' (Germany)
... aka Love, Money, Love (USA)
# Fíaskó (2000) (co-producer) 6.0/10
... aka Fiasco (International: English title)
# Sanctimony (2000) (TV) (producer) 3.4/10
# Fake - Die Fälschung (1998) (executive producer) 1.7/10
# Erste Semester, Das (1997) (executive producer) 2.8/10
# Amoklauf (1994) (producer) 2.5/10
# Barschel - Mord in Genf? (1993) (producer) 1.8/10
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| Posted: Thu, 16th Feb 2006 01:22 Post subject: |
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I like quote on imdb that's part of his mini-Bio
"Regarding his favorite book, Gustavus Myers' The History of American fortunes: "If you follow the money, like the writer did - the history of the Rockefellers and so on - you find out about real history. In that book you learn that the Civil War was not about freeing the slaves, it was all about the money, etc"
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| Posted: Thu, 16th Feb 2006 04:38 Post subject: |
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I love to go to movie theaters to movies that i want to see. i went to about 25 movies at a minimum last year. I nbought popcorn and a coke each time. I enjoyed the movie each time also but what i didnt enjoy was the 25 mexicans yapping in spenish and the fat kid crying the whole time. If move theaters would move toward more private viewing but more expsensive id be all over them every day. How bout a theater with a age limit above 8 and maybe up the ticket cost 2 bucks? Maybe even put a couch in a room and a 100inch tv and some surround sound id still go. Just control the damn crowds please.
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