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 Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 08:11 Post subject: Wow... fking hell, its been a while |
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Cheating, its been a while since ive been close to a situation like that.
And today was not pretty, i felt that horrible pain from secrecy and cheating.
One of my best childhood friend and his girlfriend for 6 years who we also knew for 6 years, had an ugly ending and i was too close to experience it.
They had 3 months with distance and problems, fighting etc and a lot has been going on behind scenes that i didnt know about, and things came up now, last thing was that he found a conversation with a guy and photos with a guy talking sweetly, so he was mad and that brought more distance to those 3 months they had away from each other.
Then he said he wanted to understand and forgive her etc, that she had to come clean, etc, so she gave him some bs stories, he didnt take them but he still took her in again.....
So today we all went out... hamburgers at a friend's house, all 6 of the childhood best friends together with wives and gfs. My BF's GF started some weird behaviour. Wanting to talk outside the house,, wanted to go home early, used one friend's wife cellphone for 30 mins outside the house...
Then our friend's wife who knew how weird things were between them, called the phone my BF's GF called back. It was some guy who revealed her that he was dating the bitch since 5 months ago. But she didnt say it to us right away.
So we finished up, went to leave our friend's gf at her house because "her sister and mother had arrived and she had to go early" but the house was dark, no lights on, and my friend noticed.... We also noticed someone constantly calling our friend and she didnt let him answer his phone while driving.
So we left her home and arrived at our home and my other friend broke the news.... the wife of our other friend had told him that she called and what was said and gave us the phone number.
So our friend called the guy, faced him and he confirmed what was up, after many calls and a while later, he finally put the bitch on the phone in speaker talking from the cheating guy's house, he dumped her right there in speaker phone.
Listening to all that and realizing all that was so painfull, oh boy the lies, the secrecy, the hipocrecy.
What is amazing is how my friend treated her, maybe he was a bit dull and shy, maybe too much gaming as i heard but this guy..... here is how great he is....
-She had to move away from her parents and live with her sister and brother in a small house, and he helped her live in his house, helped her home etc.
-She had a surgery on her back to correct her spine and he would bathe her and treat her because her own mother did not want to do it. He went everywhere with her and helped in all those rough times of the surgery.
-He decided to not go to USA and stay her to study medicine with her and to plan with her.
He was really serious about her even as dull and shy as he may be he truly cared and loved. And this is what he gets in the end. Boy, i felt for him, i felt it too much, because ive lived through cheating too many times.
Oh life, we need so much patience to live through other people's bs.
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couleur
[Moderator] Janitor
Posts: 14361
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 10:45 Post subject: |
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The worst part is where people need to cheat because they are not man enough to admit that they want it over. ... not man enough ... Oh wait.
"Enlightenment is man's emergence from his self-imposed nonage. Nonage is the inability to use one's own understanding without another's guidance. This nonage is self-imposed if its cause lies not in lack of understanding but in indecision and lack of courage to use one's own mind without another's guidance. Dare to know! (Sapere aude.) "Have the courage to use your own understanding," is therefore the motto of the enlightenment."
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Morphineus
VIP Member
Posts: 24883
Location: Sweden
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 12:33 Post subject: |
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Did I read about your BoyFriend or best friend? 
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 12:48 Post subject: |
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When a man cheats, he's a scumbag, who gave in to is urges.
When a woman cheats, it's completely justified, because she wasn't getting the emotional attention she deserves ... bla bla bla. That's how society justifies it, and from what I have seen, women are far more likely to cheat, as they are easily seduced - especially those with incorrect self-image.
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Morphineus
VIP Member
Posts: 24883
Location: Sweden
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 16:27 Post subject: |
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Darn 
All my dreams of having a sexy Dominican boyfriend being crushed
On a more serious note:
I usually drop people from my friend circle the moment I know they are cheating. Don't want individuals like that around. And if I get the chance I'll tell their other half. Bit drastic I'll admit but I won't have them drag me down in their lies.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 16:27 Post subject: |
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my friend's father has a situation, where he and his wife are still married and live together, but their relationship broke down years ago when the wife cheated on him with his best friend. they got over it i guess. they stuck together for their kid and probably cause it's cheaper. both have seperate personal lives now.
now the father fell in love with his colleague who has a husband and a 6 year old kid. they havent slept with each other yet, but there's a ton of emotional cheating. The woman doesnt love his husband any more i think and really likes my friends father. the guy rode hundreds of miles on his chopper on 3 consecutive days to see her in the other side of the country and he went back every night. if she divorces it's gonna leave a mark on the kid. a tricky situation... 
i5-3570k @4.4gHz, MSI GTX 970 GAMING 4g OC'd, MSI z77a-g45, Corsair Vengeance 8gb 1600mHz, Corsair TX650 PSU, Crucial M4 128gb, WD 1.5 TB HDD, Seagate 1TB HDD, LG 27MB85R-B 1440p
RSI name: ctulu
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 16:39 Post subject: |
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wanna know what I do to bitches who cheat on me? I pretend I don't know anything, then drive their cars into a lake, or push them off a very high edge.
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tonizito
VIP Member
Posts: 51423
Location: Portugal, the shithole of Europe.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 16:54 Post subject: |
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| FireMaster wrote: | | wanna know what I do to bitches who cheat on me? I pretend I don't know anything, then drive their cars into a lake, or push them off a very high edge. |
Nice try bro, but there are no lakes in the desert
| boundle (thoughts on cracking AITD) wrote: | | i guess thouth if without a legit key the installation was rolling back we are all fucking then |
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 17:16 Post subject: |
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I wanted to talk to the guy, make some mental damage since he did got into a serious relationship with her, but i wanted to leave it at that since i saw my friend kind of chilled out.
But seriously who the fuck takes the decision to be in a relationship with someone who is capable of cheating like a fking bitch while having a 6 year long relationship. How fking dull do you have to be to not see the kind of person they are choosing to have in their sides....
fking hell. Then they get pissed off and doubtful when the women starts her whining and shitty attitude and cheats on them too. FFS.
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 20:39 Post subject: |
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I've been on the been-cheated-on end too. In my experience, if your girlfriend is easily jealous, you have to seriously watch out because if they consider cheating such a realistic possibility, it's because they have considered it themselves or have done it / doing it.
The one long-ish term relationship (almost a year) I've had, basically involved her having several guy friends who were clearly after her, were bad mouthing me and basically, she refused to see that they were trying to sabotage what we had. Any female friend I dared to have, she'd see my as cheating on her. In fact, she stole the mobile from one of the closest female friends (who I knew from before I even met her) to send a text message how she loved me and how she wanted me to leave my gf. It was basically a test to see what I would respond - and even though I made it clear that I had no interest (the phone never turned up afterwards, but it was obvious she had stolen it) she still was suspicious.
Funny thing is, half a year later, one of her guy friends was suddenly "kicked out" of her friend circle. Turns out she had been seeing him on the side - she completely denied it until he showed me nude pics (which she had sent to me as well) on his phone as evidence and the text messages. Realizing she couldn't deny it any longer, she made up a weak excuse and after a long long chat where I told her to break contact with certain male friends of hers (those I didn't trust), we tried to salvage things although things were very shaky. Two months later, it fell apart anyway - the trust was gone and once again, she had "acquired" new guy friends and only a week after we broke up, I discovered she had already started dating one of those guys.
So yeah ... it's really sad. And it always happens with girls who have a low self image - they see it as a way to boost their self worth, as if fucking guys means they're better when it's the opposite.
Also, women cheating ARE worse than guys cheating, don't let society tell you differently. Men are biologically driven to spread their DNA - women have the drive for security and to raise a family so guess who has the least excuses to cheat? Exactly!
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zipfero
Posts: 8938
Location: White Shaft
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 20:43 Post subject: |
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| red_avatar wrote: | I've been on the been-cheated-on end too. In my experience, if your girlfriend is easily jealous, you have to seriously watch out because if they consider cheating such a realistic possibility, it's because they have considered it themselves or have done it / doing it.
The one long-ish term relationship (almost a year) I've had, basically involved her having several guy friends who were clearly after her, were bad mouthing me and basically, she refused to see that they were trying to sabotage what we had. Any female friend I dared to have, she'd see my as cheating on her. In fact, she stole the mobile from one of the closest female friends (who I knew from before I even met her) to send a text message how she loved me and how she wanted me to leave my gf. It was basically a test to see what I would respond - and even though I made it clear that I had no interest (the phone never turned up afterwards, but it was obvious she had stolen it) she still was suspicious.
Funny thing is, half a year later, one of her guy friends was suddenly "kicked out" of her friend circle. Turns out she had been seeing him on the side - she completely denied it until he showed me nude pics (which she had sent to me as well) on his phone as evidence and the text messages. Realizing she couldn't deny it any longer, she made up a weak excuse and after a long long chat where I told her to break contact with certain male friends of hers (those I didn't trust), we tried to salvage things although things were very shaky. Two months later, it fell apart anyway - the trust was gone and once again, she had "acquired" new guy friends and only a week after we broke up, I discovered she had already started dating one of those guys.
So yeah ... it's really sad. And it always happens with girls who have a low self image - they see it as a way to boost their self worth, as if fucking guys means they're better when it's the opposite.
Also, women cheating ARE worse than guys cheating, don't let society tell you differently. Men are biologically driven to spread their DNA - women have the drive for security and to raise a family so guess who has the least excuses to cheat? Exactly! |
  Sounds like a Redpill subscriber
8 out of 10 dentists prefer zipfero to competing brands(fraich3 and Mutantius)!
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 20:55 Post subject: |
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Nalo
nothing
Posts: 13522
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 22:11 Post subject: |
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Last edited by Nalo on Wed, 3rd Jul 2024 06:22; edited 2 times in total
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| Posted: Sun, 5th Jan 2014 23:51 Post subject: |
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I have read quite a few studies about the more promiscuous nature of male homosexual relationships, when compared to other couples, and there seems to be a point to be made here, but I don't know, what that has to do with what red avatar is saying.
I think cheating has no excuse, ever. I'm in the lucky situation of having never been cheated on (and I never cheated on anyone, ever). But I'm sure I wouldn't continue a relationship if cheating ever happened - that for me is the point of no return. Intimacy and trust are then lost forever.
That's why I never courted women who were known to have had many partners. I mean, how could you trust a person, whom you know 3 of your buddies already fucked ... right.
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 00:09 Post subject: |
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| Radicalus wrote: | | I have read quite a few studies about the more promiscuous nature of male homosexual relationships, when compared to other couples, and there seems to be a point to be made here, but I don't know, what that has to do with what red avatar is saying. |
I thought it was rather obvious? It takes more restraint for a man than for a woman to remain faithful (again, proven by studies). It's simple logic to deduce then that it's easier for women not to cheat than for men, ergo it's worse when women cheat (even though it's awful in any case, I agree)
Think of it from a different view point: you have a rich kid and a poor kid. For which kid is it worse to steal? Stealing is bad, full stop, but for a rich kid who already has plenty and should have a lesser drive to acquire more, it IS worse to steal than a poor kid who has little and has been dreaming of more. Don't think in black & white, there's a million shades of grey in everything we do - I'm talking about general nature, not individual cases but it still holds water.
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 00:27 Post subject: |
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"I thought it was rather obvious? It takes more restraint for a man than for a woman to remain faithful"
I call bullshit on that. Takes kind of equal amount of restraint. What you speak of is an excuse. Please do link some studies, that state, that it takes more restraint. There isn't only a biological factor to this, we are conscious beings.
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 06:08 Post subject: |
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Well within my circle we do mantain an idea from experiences.
Men cheat looking for fun and usually prefer to hold onto their relationships.
Women cheat looking for love, looking for reassurance etc. They fall in love with the cheat.
But things usually things go both ways but that just our idea from experience.
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chiv
Posts: 27530
Location: Behind You...
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 07:17 Post subject: |
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| MORPHINEUS wrote: | | Did I read about your BoyFriend or best friend? |
This... Was thinking how awkward it must have been to find out his boyfriend was seeing another woman   |
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 12:04 Post subject: |
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| red_avatar wrote: | | Radicalus wrote: | | I have read quite a few studies about the more promiscuous nature of male homosexual relationships, when compared to other couples, and there seems to be a point to be made here, but I don't know, what that has to do with what red avatar is saying. |
I thought it was rather obvious? It takes more restraint for a man than for a woman to remain faithful (again, proven by studies). It's simple logic to deduce then that it's easier for women not to cheat than for men, ergo it's worse when women cheat (even though it's awful in any case, I agree) |
Please show me these studies. I'd really like to see them. To me it sounds like "we asked 5 white middleclass God-fearing women what they think a woman is about? They responded safety, homemaking."
Please explain to me where does the judgmental value come from? Because i really don't see how its worse when women cheat? Is that a scientific measure? Because you're "logic" follows something that's totally subjective like morals etc. 
A women cheats on a guy who constantly cheats on her. By your logic she's still done a worse deed than him, because he's genetically predisposed to cheating while she had to really try hard and fight her nature to cheat? Basically she had to put effort in it?
| red_avatar wrote: | | Think of it from a different view point: you have a rich kid and a poor kid. For which kid is it worse to steal? Stealing is bad, full stop, but for a rich kid who already has plenty and should have a lesser drive to acquire more, it IS worse to steal than a poor kid who has little and has been dreaming of more. Don't think in black & white, there's a million shades of grey in everything we do - I'm talking about general nature, not individual cases but it still holds water. |
Why is there a difference between the poor kid and rich kid? Are they stealing food? Then sure. They both steal a ferrari? No difference. What you are doing is taking one thing that is supposed to define humans and going insane with it. A rich kid steals, his father sexually abused him, his mother committed suicide. By your logic the important information is that he's rich, so its more wrong and fuck him. Same for your women. A woman who's had traumatic stuff happen to her etc. vs a man who's psychologically stable, woman is "worse" because studies have shown some bullshit.
The amount of generalizations you make is mind boggling and i hate that. Not to mention shoving your twisted morals down our throats as "fact".
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 18:29 Post subject: |
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Well yeah actually, i hate this kind of behavior, do you know how easy and pleasant it is to say "Im sorry, i dont feel like this is what i want, i loved you but after time i have left that behind and i dont want to hurt you by lying or faking something that doesn't exist in me anymore, im sorry but i want to break it off and ask for you understanding blablalbalbalblalba" DONE.
NO lies, no excuses, no cheating, no cuntish behavior, just being done with it, i come off clean, you go off clean, everything clear. And then give it time and start to know whoever the hell fills u up.
Is that so hard? Seems like it is for some people. She just showed her whole family and all of us and the family of my friend, all their university friends, how much of a bitch she is in facebook.
How am i not to hate such a stupid retarded behavior. 
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 18:41 Post subject: |
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I've been on the cheating end, but never in this way.
I've been with other people's wives and girlfriends. But it's usually just a one-time event or a reoccurring one, but with big pauses between events. Almost all the times the girls have been friends of mine, and they use our arrangement to blow off steam and relaxation. None of them has left their SO, and as far as I know their affection has only become stronger and smoother.
| Lutzifer wrote: | | and yes, mine is only average |
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 18:57 Post subject: |
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Everybody has their own drives.
| Lutzifer wrote: | | and yes, mine is only average |
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 18:59 Post subject: |
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| StrEagle wrote: | I've been on the cheating end, but never in this way.
I've been with other people's wives and girlfriends. But it's usually just a one-time event or a reoccurring one, but with big pauses between events. Almost all the times the girls have been friends of mine, and they use our arrangement to blow off steam and relaxation. None of them has left their SO, and as far as I know their affection has only become stronger and smoother. |
They are cheating bitches nonetheless, mate. Keep calming your conscience, but that is still what they are. There are no such things as one time cheaters. If someone cheats once, they'll more than likely do it again. Everything else is fluff.
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 19:02 Post subject: |
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You see, cheating is not only a lack of affection for the SO, it's also a complete lack of respect and dignity. Cheating on someone is the complete sabotage of trust. I haven't seen a single relationship gain back traction after a cheating happened, things are just not the same afterwards.
When you say their affection has become stronger, you in fact mean they are ashamed, and feel guilt. And so they should.
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 19:02 Post subject: |
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I did not claim I was their only transgression.
As I said - there are people who are not ok with cheating, and there are people ok with cheating.
And people have different definition of cheating.
One of the wives invited her husband for a threesome..
I will not defend other people's wants and needs. Everyone decides for themselves.
And you should not generalize that broadly. I'm just saying there is another side to the practice.
| Lutzifer wrote: | | and yes, mine is only average |
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| Posted: Mon, 6th Jan 2014 19:15 Post subject: |
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"One of the wives invited her husband for a threesome"
And did you do it? >D
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but it's still largely true. It's sadly enough more in our nature to want to have sex as much and with as many girls as possible - the gay community is perfect evidence of this because, again sadly enough, the amount of partners an average gay guy has, is (according to multiple studies) 3-4 times higher than for a straight man and there's way more cheating going on as well (which is why HIV is such a worry in the gay community). For lesbian women, it's about the same as with straight couples so there's a clear difference. So yeah, if women cheat, it's more grave - not that both people aren't cunts for cheating, but women don't have the same drive as men so have less of an excuse ergo cheating is worse for a woman.
