Renown actor Tom Hanks murders 5
Page 1 of 1
fisk




Posts: 9145
Location: Von Oben
PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 20:37    Post subject: Renown actor Tom Hanks murders 5
Quote:
LOS ANGELES—Millions across the planet expressed astonishment and exasperation earlier today, saying they no longer had any idea who to admire following beloved film actor Tom Hanks’ brutal Wednesday morning murder spree that claimed the lives of five. “Okay, honestly? Tom Hanks now?” said Los Angeles woman Marie Irvine, 43, echoing the voices of millions of human beings worldwide who reported being devastated by recent events like Oscar Pistorius’ murder trial, Lance Armstrong’s doping admission, and new accounts confirming that the Forrest Gump star strangled a family of five in Burbank before sitting down on their couch and calmly waiting for the police to arrive. “I literally don’t know who I’m supposed to look up to and revere at this point. Who are the good, respectable people in the world again? Because I was pretty much down to just Tom Hanks before this happened.” A majority of people reported feeling even more let down by Tom Hanks’ series of homicides considering they had already forgiven the actor for a 2006 drunk driving rampage that killed 12 children.


-source: SOME NEWS SITE

 Spoiler:
 


Yes, yes I'm back.
Somewhat.
Back to top
couleur
[Moderator] Janitor



Posts: 14361

PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 20:40    Post subject: Re: Renown actor Tom Hanks murders 5
There still is Morgan Freeman!


"Enlightenment is man's emergence from his self-imposed nonage. Nonage is the inability to use one's own understanding without another's guidance. This nonage is self-imposed if its cause lies not in lack of understanding but in indecision and lack of courage to use one's own mind without another's guidance. Dare to know! (Sapere aude.) "Have the courage to use your own understanding," is therefore the motto of the enlightenment."
Back to top
Sin317
Banned



Posts: 24322
Location: Geneva
PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 20:40    Post subject:
nm, trolled Smile
Back to top
zmed




Posts: 9234
Location: Orbanistan
PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 21:16    Post subject:
Yeah, sounded fishy after only mentioning the actual murders in passing, and only concentrating on the public opinion. No police report, no statement from his agent, etc. Was well written in the usual Onion fashion, but wasn't very convincing. Smile
Back to top
PumpAction
[Schmadmin]



Posts: 26759

PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 21:22    Post subject:
Smelled something fish the moment I saw that tainted didn't post the news


=> NFOrce GIF plugin <= - Ryzen 3800X, 16GB DDR4-3200, Sapphire 5700XT Pulse
Back to top
LeoNatan
☢ NFOHump Despot ☢



Posts: 73226
Location: Ramat HaSharon, Israel 🇮🇱
PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 21:26    Post subject:
PumpAction wrote:
Smelled something fisk the moment I saw that tainted didn't post the news

fixd Laughing
Back to top
m3th0d2008




Posts: 9881
Location: Outhouse
PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 22:16    Post subject:
Onion <3


2011 - 2016 Build • Fractal Design R5 Titanium (Window) • i5-2500K @ 4,5GHz • Corsair Hydro h115i • ASRock Fatal1ty P67 Performance • 2x4Gb G.Skill Ripjaws F3-10666CL9-4GBRL • EVGA GeForce GTX 970 SSC ACX 2.0+ • Corsair RM550(W) PSU • 2x Samsung 850 Evo (120gb/500gb) •
2018 - x Build • Fractal Design Define R6 Gunmetal • Intel Core i9 9900K • Corsair H150i Pro RGB AIO • Asus ROG MAXIMUS XI HERO • 2x16Gb Corsair Dominator Platinum DDR4-3200 • EVGA GeForce GTX 970 SSC ACX 2.0+ • Corsair HX850i PSU • 1x Samsung 970 Evo M.2, 1x Samsung 860 Evo SATA, 1x Samsung 850 Evo SATA •
Back to top
Yondaime
VIP Member



Posts: 11741

PostPosted: Wed, 20th Feb 2013 22:30    Post subject:
⁢⁢


Last edited by Yondaime on Mon, 2nd Dec 2024 15:40; edited 1 time in total
Back to top
UreKismet




Posts: 487

PostPosted: Thu, 21st Feb 2013 01:27    Post subject:
Hmm whether or not the story is true is less relevant than that we all clicked on the link. Why should the activities of a human that we don't know & who we only perceive by way of watching him in movies when he is tryin hard to come across as someone diferent from who he is, or thru PR spin generated by paid deceivers, interest us?
I don't like bein that sort of a stickybeak n normally resist the temptation to be titillated by gossip - today I failed.
Back to top
Page 1 of 1 All times are GMT + 1 Hour
NFOHump.com Forum Index - The Useless Void
Signature/Avatar nuking: none (can be changed in your profile)  


Display posts from previous:   

Jump to:  
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum


Powered by phpBB 2.0.8 © 2001, 2002 phpBB Group